The Best South Park Quotes

We have selected our favourite South Park quotes, have a gander!

Eric Cartman – “Okay, that does it! Now, listen! Why is it that everything today has involved things either going in or coming out of my ass?!”

Mr Garrison – “Okay, children. Let’s all gather around and bob for stupid apples now. You go first, Bebe. That’s good. Just use those mouth muscles like the girls in Beijing.”

Mr Garrison – “Oh, Jesus tap-dancing Christ!”

Eric Cartman – “Well I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an ultravibe pleasure 2000.”

Eric Cartman – “Respect My Authority!”

Doctor – “Vaginitis occurs when a person stops eating meat.. Those sores on his skin were actually small vaginas. If we hadn’t stopped it in time, Stan would have eventually become one great big giant pussy.”

Chris Stotch – “Sometimes telling a little white lie is okay. Like, for instance, when you catch your father jerking off in a Gay Mens’ Bath House.”

Stan - “Oh my god. Jay Leno’s chin killed Kenny.”
Kyle - “You bastard.”
Jay Leno - “Ah, who cares? He dies every episode.”


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